10 Things

I haven't updated in a little bit, so I decided to throw this together.

I work at Blockbuster, as I have mentioned, and over the last year I have come up with a few things that could help people when shopping at our store. This list is actually more for the people working there, and how you could avoid being an ass. This is my "10 Things You Shouldn't Do When Renting From Blockbuster."

Do Not...

10. Be Lazy

- This one is huge for me. Our store is very simple; movies are organized on the wall in alphabetical order. If a movie is more than 12 months old, it is in the center of the store. The center of the store is organized by genre (and yes, Die Hard is in Action...) and each genre is also alphabetized. 

If you make an honest effort to find the movie you're looking for but still fail to locate it, fine, I'll help you. But if you just walk in and ask me this question, "Where would I find Kung Fu Panda?" don't be surprised if my response is, "Oh, over by the huge Kung Fu Panda display. Ya know, by the "K" movies on the wall...between "J" and "L." Or you could just look for yourself."

9. Fail to Have Even a Slight Understanding of the Title You're Looking For.

- There was a customer that asked Mike, my manager and friend, "Where is the movie Ahnce?" Now I typed "Ahnce" because it is how they said the title, AH-NCE. The movie they were looking for was "Once." Do everything in your power to never become that person.

8. Blame Me For Your Stupidity

- "How does your rental policy work?" I explain this so many times, and in people's defense it is an honest question. But once I explain this, why must people rebuttal with, "Wait, a "re-stocking fee?" So it is a late fee? I don't get it." Okay fine, let me explain it in baby terms: Return your movie when it is due.

7. Blame Me For Prices

- "Why are your movies five dollars?" Because I hate you.

6. Blame Me For Our Drink Selection

- "Why don't you have Livewire?" GREAT question.

5. Ask if You Can Have Backercards

- At Blockbuster we have what we call backercards. These serve as a replacement for movies once they get checked out, so we know where they go if we run out of copies. These aren't free for giveaway then, and no you can't have any. I had this kid walk up with one and when I asked why he had it he said, "Wait I can't have this?" Wow.

4. Fail to Meet the Cashier Halfway With items

- Let me go into detail here. When the cashier is waiting in front of a computer for your items, there are certain things they expect. We have a very large amount of objects that separate us from you, and because of this we need you to adhere to a few rules. 

If you have movies, do not lift them up and move them forward an inch, forcing us to reach over and grab them from you like its a pot of gold that we need to work for. Just meet us halfway; make it easy for both you and the cashier to complete the transaction. 

3. Forget about a Coupon Or Movie Until After We Have Scanned Everything

- Fewer things piss me off than when this happens. If you have a coupon, have it with you when you hand me the movies. Don't wait for me to scan everything and then say, 

You: Oh, I have this coupon here!

Me: Then shove it, because we're done here. 

The problem is this: I have to credit money back to your account when I already scan stuff. This results in me having to type up a reason on the computer, stating why I felt it necessary to give you five dollars back.

 It is even worse when people have pop or candy but never hand it to me. Considering I never adopted the ability to see through things, I don't notice it when items are on the other side of the counter covered by a computer, gift cards, a credit card swiper machine and your ugly face. Hand us all of your items when you first get to the counter! Also, apply rule #4 here as well... don't make us reach for pops and candy... hand it to us. 

2. Poke the Credit Machine With Anything Other Than the Provided Pen...

- When you swipe your credit card, you will be prompted with a few questions. These are simple: 

Machine: Credit or Debit? 

You Choose: Credit (even if you have debit, choose this because it doesn't matter)

Machine: Amount Okay? 

You Choose: Yes

Answer this mini-quiz and you will be rewarded with whatever you wanted in the store. When you have to choose the answers to these questions, do not use the following methods: Pressing the options with the corner of your credit card.... it won't register; also, don't point with your finger, it is unsanitary and drives me insane. Just use the freakin pen that exists for the exact purpose of choosing these things.

1. Stare At Me When I Greet You As You Enter the Store

- At Blockbuster I am forced to say "Hello!" to every single person that walks into the store. At times, the people that enter the store don't say "Hi" back. This bothers me because it doesn't take a lot of effort and makes me feel like a jackass. The worst part, however, is when someone glares at me as I greet them. Am I an alien species to you? Do you not understand the basic logistics of a greeting? It takes one simple command, you don't even have to be sincere. Just be polite enough to give us something back. 

Well there ya go, a list to help you on your simple rental adventure. I have plenty more complaints, so if people respond to this well then I'll come up with another list. Have a good day and try to avoid being a jackass.